McMansion Buying Guide

Are you poor? Have no down payment? Never intend to actually pay your mortgage?
No problem.
We here at the Federal Reserve would like to help you.
Our new plan, How To Buy A Million Dollar Home For Pennies On Said Dollar, is guaranteed to save you hundreds of needless thousands of dollars.
Here's how:
First, pick a really big, really expensive house. One you can't afford.
Second, get it financed. Don't worry, our banks are giving money away.
Third, don't make any payments. None.
Fourth, convince all your friends to stop making payments, just like you!
Fifth, ask the government to refinance your house at it's present value.
Congratulations! See? You can live beyond your means!
And we're here to help you do it.